Adjusting to life

Hey yall..

So i haven’t posted on here recently as ive been struggling adjusting back to life. Since i last blogged, i signed up for college classes, started the process of buying a car, and even though this is a big happy time in my life, i am sadder then ive ever been….

I feel like every moment, of every day, i think about Turkana.

I miss my kids.

I miss the culture.

I miss the simplicity.

I created a bond with Samuel & Lilian that can never be broken. They are my kids, theoretically. I miss their smiles, their laughter, their energy.. I dont feel whole without them. I dont feel right not seeing them every day. I want them back in my life… I want to wake up and know in a few hours i can play with them. I want them to show me what their learning in class. I want them to just be there everyday, waiting for me, like they did everyday while i was in Africa…

I miss the culture. They are so humble and proud of everything they have, which is nothing by our standards. A wise missionary once told me that there are 5 key items to survival : Jesus, food, water, shelter, & community. Although the roads were bumpy, i miss that ride to school every morning before it got too hot, with my arm out the window & every little kid whether they were in school or not saying “how are yoou” as we drove past. These people are just surviving, and yet so much more grateful, and faithful then we are. I learned to value what you have there.

And, i miss the simplicity. I miss how these people had no running water, no plumbing, some didn’t even have clothes, yet they were okay. They were HAPPY. and they were thankful. Some were hungry, and dirty, and thirsty, but never hesitated to show off their homes. They are content and happy with how simple their lives are. I want to live in a world that simple.

Because of those 3 areas of my trip to Turkana, Kenya, Africa…
I cry at night.
I get easily upset with people here in America.
I dont feel whole.
I dont feel happy.
I dont feel like [i belong here].

I want to go back to Africa. I want to stay there forever. I want to have faith like them. I want to have pride like them. I want to have energy like them.

I want to have LIFE like them…